Busy day today; after thinking my book selling was going into a rather deathly lull, specially with changes within the company I direct sell for, it’s now going rather well, I have two large and one very large events coming up. The very large event could be 15,000 people if the weather is good and I’m doing it with two other people and I’ve spent a large chunk of today sorting stuff out for that, so the washing machine and the dishwasher have laid idle, well I figured if I were actually at work, i.e. ‘proper’ work, I wouldn’t exactly be loading the dishwasher and doing the washing would I? I made that point to Mr. Lacer when he pointed out none of the dishes hadn’t been washed (it wasn’t that bad, we were just out of beakers) and he was verging on going “and yes?” when I pointed out I was working with two other people who were depending on me doing certain things by certain times. Luckily the kids were well behaved (reasonably) today, trying to do a spreadsheet whilst your computer obsessed 2 year old is also trying to get on there was a little ‘interesting’ and at one point Girl Lacer was laying next to be going “This is boring,”, so I pointed out to her why didn’t she go and play with one of her many toys? I was slightly bad mummy though, in that both of them where still in their pjs until just before lunch time, but that is one of the (only) advantages of nursery being in the afternoon.
So lunch was hurried and Girl Lacer packed off to nursery, whilst me and Boy Lacer returned home to look into the wonderful world of brown paper bags. Time flew and we went to pick up Girl Lacer again, since Boy Lacer has stopped napping, Girl Lacer has been missing out on our shopping trips, even if it’s only to buy bread and milk, which it normally is. And I have to admit I do sometimes see mums when I’m out shopping with just Boy Lacer, whilst Girl Lacer is at nursery and those mums have children a bit younger than mine, pushing that double buggy I was glad to get rid of, a baby in the back, two year old in the front and feel a pang for those days, even though I very much remember a time when the kids were that age and we were out shopping in John Lewis and I saw in the distance a woman pushing a double buggy and my immediate thought (honestly) was “Who’s that poor woman? She looks even more knackered than I feel,” it was only a moment or so later when I realised that woman was me in a mirror. Anyway, Girl Lacer has been missing the purchasing of bread and I’ve been missing having her there, even though just prior to Boy Lacer stopping napping I was swearing blind that I would never ever go shopping with two children ever ever again! So what with the weather being nice, it’s proved ideal for going shopping after nursery, so there’s not so much of a rush to get back in time for anything. It wasn’t the most exciting of shopping trips, the kids got a McDonalds, as I was craving chips and we got some fabric for my sister’s birthday present, which is quite complex and I haven’t started making it yet and it’s for Saturday, yelp! We then went down to Waitrose (and for those waiting for the lion bit, it’s coming).
After we had got our food, we went to one of the lifts and were waiting for it to arrive but (despite no ‘out of order’ sign) it didn’t look to be working, so Girl Lacer piped up,
“Maybe it’s because there’s a lion in it.”
So I replied “We better get out of here then, because that lift door is going to open any minute and he’ll eat us!”
So we crossed to the other side of the store for the other lifts and I go “Look, all the other shoppers are leaving because there’s a lion in there”.
To which Girl Lacer “Yes, they’re going really quickly, although they’re getting their shopping first.”
And I reply “Yes, he thinks he can get humans as food, as it’s a supermarket,”
“Yes” said Girl Lacer, “He’s going to eat the shop assistants,”
We manage to dive into the lifts just in time and exit the store whilst being chased by the lion.
We walk past the clothes shops and I go “I bet he’s going to buy a sun hat.”
“And a really big dress” replied Girl Lacer
We cut through the cafe area of town and Girl Lacer points to one of the outside tables, “Look! He’s over there having a drink!”
We sneak past but we narrowly avoid being pounced on, as the lion tries to ambush us by hiding behind the bushes by the train station.
We rush down the main road out of town, the lion to quote Girl Lacer “miles behind us”. Thankfully the lion is delayed even further when he stops to have a pizza. We pass the barbers and I suggest that maybe that lion will stop and have a haircut, to which Girl Lacer replies,
“Don’t be silly, he wouldn’t fit into the chair, he’ll just have to have long lion hair.”
Brief interlude in the chase when Girl Lacer discovers a previously unknown (to her) fascinating fact about mummy, that I used to work (volunteer) in a zoo (long time ago and not for very long either) as she enquires what do they do in real life if a lion escapes and I told her that they have special people to ‘put the lion back’, to which she wanted to know how I knew that, so I explained.
We’re then rounding the corner into the last strait home, Girl Lacer has decided the lion can’t be caught by a rope, as he’s just eaten pizza (to which she enquires “What does pizza do?”, she is fascinated about the various functions of different foods at the moment, so I tell her it gives you energy and makes you strong (the calcium in the cheese bit). But then she decides she’s strong to, so she captures the lion on the point of her sword and she’s going to take it back to the zoo. But then she decides they’re not feeding the lion in the zoo, which is why he escaped, so with a flick of her magic wand (which she also has up her sleeve), she turns the lion into a nice lion, who eats sweets, which she tells the lion has people in them. She then carries the lion home in her arms, whilst scooting on her scooter. I enquire, do we have enough food at home for a lion? She says yes, because she got a big bag of sweets for her fairy in the supermarket and a big bag of sweets for the lion, but when we’ve run out he can go back to the zoo. The lion is now sleeping on my bed, as he has to sleep with mummy and daddy apparently, there will be lion fur everywhere.